Land Of The Living Skies

Land Of The Living Skies, this our motto here in Saskatchewan. You'll see it on the plates of our vehicles, you'll hear people say it, and you'll probably witness it if you've ever taken a look up at the sky once nightfall strikes. I do find this motto to be quite true. However, as time goes on and our ozone layer dwindles, I find our city becoming more and more windy. Now maybe it was like this when I was a child but I don't quite remember it being this bad. Therefore, I officially suggest that our new motto is 'The land of the CAR-RAZ-EEEEE WINDS'!

Smart man

My husband, he's a smart man. Like probably ten times smarter than I'll ever be which is fine cause it just means that I can play cute and innocent all the time. lol. But every once in a while, I'm able to pull one over on him. This does not happen often so I need to relish in it whenever possible. Not like gloat....okay, maybe I gloat a little but really, I need to take what I can get.
So today, I'm not sure how this came up in conversation, I remembered the time when I tricked him and OH how I tricked him good.

Me being the sweet wife that I am will occasionally give him a massage. So one night I'm massaging away like a SUPER AWESOME wife (gf at the time) would. At the end of it, I thought it would be funny to flick his nippies. So, I did! (insert evil laugh)

Keith: What was that for?!
Me: What?! They always flick your nipples after a massage. (and then I gave a look like he was weird for not knowing this)
Keith: Really?!
Me: uncontrollable fits of laughter - giggling.....nnnnnooohhhoooo....pfffffttttt....oooo.....snort....na......ooohhh....choke.....wheezing.....catches breath, No, they don't flick your nipple after a massage!!!

I can't remember what happened after that. I think I was so light headed from all the laughter. I'm pretty sure Keith looked confused, then started laughing. I just told him I got him GOOOOOOOOOOOD! Cause I totally did and he can deny it ALL he wants but I know the truth. For at least one second, he believed that we are actually supposed to get our nipples flicked after a massage. BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

I know, I'm so going to hell for that one.LOL!

Product of the week (although it's not an actual product)

This is one of my MOST favorite websites in the world.
Why? Because it's an online tool that helps with weight loss and you can sign up for FREE! I do believe that you can also pay if you want access to more things. However, without paying, I can look up calorie information on many foods and beverages. Oh, and you can also enter in nutritional information on foods they might not have in there which I think is pretty handy. They also have a tool where you can enter what you weigh, how much you want to lose and it will calculate how much you have to lose per week to meet your goal. Of course you can always recalculate it if you wish to do so. By far the best thing I think, is that I can track what food I eat and my activities for the day and it will calculate how many calories I had that day and how much I burnt. It is SO GREAT! It really is one of the most handy dandy sites I've come across.

Anyway, for anyone battling the bulge like I am might really appreciate this site. I know I do. ENJOY!

www.fitday.com

Battle of the bulge

As most of you probably know, I have battled with my weight my ENTIRE life. I'm up, I'm down, I'm all around. Since the beginning of January, with much dedication, I have been going to the gym at least three times a week which isn't too shabby. Last week, my gym gal pal and I went for the full five days. Kudos to us for sure but I still don't think I've lost a single pound so like, wtf?! lol.
Meanwhile, my gym gal pal is doing AMAZING! In fact, this weekend we exchanged clothes and I was SO pleased with what she gave to me (and super appreciative) - all of which I hope to fit into soon. :) As for her, she walked out of here with a box full of clothes (that I currently don't fit into) which pretty much all fit her. YAY! I can honestly say that I love the progress we're making. And even though I don't think I've lost a single pound, I can say that I've gained some things, besides weight! lol.
So far, I've gained energy during the day, I've gained endurance AND most importantly, I've gained a new friend! I mean, losing weight is great but the experience is what life is really all about for me personally. Although, losing some weight along the way would be AWESOME after all! lol. And now the opportunity has arisen to do a challenge which is similar to The Biggest Loser show that I keep himming and humming about.

We (the people that choose to enter) weigh in once a week and the outcome is based on our percentage lost as opposed to pounds so that no one will actually know what we weigh. THANK GAWD! lol. They intend to have incentives along the way to keep us motivated which is cool because like, who doesn't like to be rewarded?! When we first weigh in, we will be assigned a number that we will use for all weigh ins instead of our names. So really, no one will actually know who is losing the most every week unless it ends up being them self. At the end of it all, if you walk away being the biggest loser, that's when you get all the attention and MONEY! To claim the prize (guarateed $500 for 1st place) you just hand in your handy dandy number for your claim to fame. Ofcourse the winner has to be okay with their name and their percentage of weight lost being announced which is fine by me. Oh, and what would I do with that money won if I were to be the biggest loser? Well I think I would treat me to a fancy dinner with lots of cheesy, yummy, food and oodles of chocolate fun for dessert! Okay, maybe know you can see my fear of why I might not be successful if I enter. LOL! :)
This seems like an exciting thing to do yet I find myself discouraged cause I haven't had much success in the past few months. But then again, what do I really have to lose?! (you know, besides like a million pounds)???! lol.

.....To Be Continued......

Product of the week is.....

NACHOS from the Freehouse! So good! I've had them two times now and they are so yummy! I don't even have to ask for extra cheeeeeeese and they are COVERED in cheese. Oh cheese, how I love you even though I'm sssssoooo not supposed to eat you!
Anyway, if you're looking for super FANTABULOUS nachos, Freehouse is the place to go!!! Damn, now I want nachos again! lol. Did I fail to mention I've had a few doubles put in me?! But in all honesty, I've had the nachos sober too and that's when I fell in love with them...it was my first time! Oh, and they come with the best guacamole I've EVER tasted in my entire life!!!

Moral of the story...I had WAY to many doubles and the NACHOS were AWESOME (despite how many drinks I had)!

:)

Dear Mother Nature (and other random thoughts)...

Dear Mother Nature,

Winter was SO last season, so like, wtf?!

Kindly,
Kim

Other random thoughts:

I thought seeing a dead corpse in a body bag would be the most awkward thing I would witness this year, an uncomfortable meeting proved me VERY wrong.

Did I look like I was ten years old when I got my license?! YIKES!

Is it possible that people are acting half crazy because it's a half moon?

It scares me to death, to think about death. I imagine being a in a seniors home and not knowing if I'll wake up from my nap or from a good night's sleep. What FREAKS me out even more is that it could happen at any time really.

I make more money than I did two years ago, but I seem to have less of it. :s

I've officially seen two people (whom I consider to be pretty) that have hairstyles that make it appear as though they have no chin. Why, oh why, would someone do that to themselves and why, oh why, would their stylist allow it?!

My husband is NEVER allowed to do a cleanse again when he has access to junk food which is nearly impossible considering we have a 711 across the street from us.lol.

Ta ta for now. :)

Monday....Monday...na-na, na,na,na,naaaaaah...

Today, was an eventful day. I was busy at work, had an excellent, workout, choked on water and saw a dead body zipped up in a blue body bag. That's right, you read that correctly!!! Now to some people, like people that work in a hospital, it would probably be no biggie. I, on the other hand, walked away with a HUGE case of the heebie jeebies. Like I said, it was an eventful day. hehe.

So towards the end of the day, a couple of co-workers and myself were chatting. One lady, we'll call her L.A. was talking about changing her hair. As we were discussing this, I asked her if she would ever consider cutting her hair shorter. To this, she responded, 'I don't want it much shorter or I can't get it up'. If you know the pervy mind I tend to have on a regular basis, then you'll understand why I started giggling. Of course my fellow co-workers started laughing as well. Once done giggling like 10 year old girls, the conversation went on. While still talking, my mind went back to her comment about not getting it up. That's when it all went Ca-RRRAAAZY! I kind of smiled and chuckled and as I did this, I was taking a sip of my water. Which, went down the wrong tube and caused me to choke. But me being me, I try containing the choking and the laughter which results in the water spouting out of my mouth like a freakin' fountain. Once all the water is gone, I continue choking, coughing and burping. Not only that, but I seem to remember sounding like I was barking out burps that I feared would end in me throwing up. Now, this wouldn't have been so bad but at the same time, I'm trying not to laugh! Why, you ask. Simply because while I'm trying to calm down and get my choking, coughing, burping, and barking under control, my co-workers were literally KILLING themselves laughing. L.A. actually had to walk away because she was laughing so hard. What a nice gal, huh?! lol.
Once everything subsided, my other co-worker, (we'll call her A.L.) finally managed to ask if I was okay once she was done laughing.lol. Which, I was but I was a little shaken and I was still giggling because I can imagine how damn funny I must have looked. Tears and all, me, choking on water while giggling about it. As I said before, I never said I was classy. :p

So now onto the dead body part. :s
At some point, L.A. had noticed while chatting with us that there were cop cars at the apartment complex across from where we work. This is not an unusual thing as it's not the most well looked after building in the city (not my workplace, but the apartment building). As usual, we took a quick glance and dismissed it. Within no time after the choking and everything, it was the end of the day and A.L. and I headed out. On my way out to my truck while crossing the street I see the cop car pull away. THEN, I see a man and women come out with a gurney. Fully loaded with a dead body in a blue body bag that resembled a blue duffel bag. BLECH! I mean, it's all I can say, it really CREEPED me out. I mean, I've seen deceased people before at funerals and everything but EEEEEWWWWW! What's worse is that I tried to avoid walking by them at all costs but I was halfway across the one street before I noticed what was happening. THEN, to cross the other street, I had to cross the street with the man and woman AND the dead person on the gurney so that I could get to my truck and they could get to there 'dead person carrier vehicle' (insert correct word here). Even just remembering it is making me feel all icky again (and I just showered)!!! But here's the thing, it's probably vain of me to call the vehicle they use the 'dead person carrier vehicle' but I also feel vain because of the thought that went through my head when I saw that blue body bag.

Instead of reflecting on life and thinking about my 'near death' experience when I choked on the water (rolls eyes at myself), I thought, 'DAMN, how the F would I ever fit in that bag (especially if I DID die while choking on my water all the while having my co-workers stand there and laugh'???! I need to get to the gym ASAP!!! lol.

Friday Funny

I've always had this thing where my mouth overproduces saliva and a bunch of other yucky stuff. There's a techinical term for it but I can never remember what it is. This means that as much as I brush my teeth and floss and use mouth wash, I'm destined to have stinky breath more often than I would like. :s I chew gum as much as possible which helps but sometimes, it's not realistic for me to have gum in my mouth. Like when I'm sleeping, or working out, or if I just don't have any gum handy. Now this is something my husband teases me about, especially before bed and first thing in the morning and my breath could be used as a weapon.lol.

So last night we were getting ready for bed and he asked me if I brushed my teeth and I said 'Yes' well, because I had like about five minutes prior. To me this was a sign that it made no difference and my breath was icky...yet again. Well, in all honestly, Keith didn't smell like sunshine either. He has been out all day running errands and definitely could have used some deodorant or something. So I think, here's my opportunity to tease him for once...or so I thought.

Me: 'Oh my GAWD Keith, take a shower or something, your BO is going to kill me'! (I giggled)
Keith: 'Not if your breath doesn't kill me first'! (we both laughed)

Touche honey, touche. :p

Happy Birthday To MEEEEE!

Hold the birthday wishes people, it's not till Sunday.lol. However, I got a lovely surprise today! As mentioned before, Keith has a tendency to surprise me because he's known to do things in advance. For example, for our one year anniversary, he sent me flowers a whole WEEK before our anniversary date. Granted he still spoiled me the day of but the flowers were a nice, thoughtful touch.

So today, I'm working away and I can tell my cell is vibrating like crazy so I looked and saw that there were two messages which made me wonder if there was an emergency. There was no emergency at all (thank goodness). It was our security guard in the main lobby saying there were flowers for me and I was all like YAY and totally surprised. What a sweetheart, right?! Back off ladies, HE'S MINE! lol.

And to think that all I asked for was for him (or someone other than me) to clean our condo so that I didn't have to do it this weekend. lol. Hopefully, I'll still get that for my birthday too. hehe.
All I can say is thank you to my love. He constantly amazes me for which I am thankful.

SWB, if you read this, I < 3 you and thank you for all that you bring into my life. :)

My apologies to Britney Spears (or possibly Jessica Simpson)

A long time ago, I used to write poetry. For a while, I thought I was pretty good at it. I was soon to realize that someone could write a poem called 'Rain' and it would be a short poem, in which all it would actually say was 'Rain'. Then some artsy person would come along and claim the short poem 'Rain' to be the most outstanding poetry EVER and so I stopped writing for the most part.lol. However, during the time I wrote, I used to keep a pen and paper by my bed in case anything came to me at night while I was trying to get my sorry tush to sleep. Now, I don't. Which, I'm starting to regret now that I'm blogging. Quite often, one minute I'll think of something really funny (atleast to me) to blog about and then by the next morning (or possibly minutes later), the thought is gone. :(

Mostly, I regret not getting up last night to write down what was happening in my head for I fear that Britney or Jessica may pay the consequences. I am quite certain, that I created either Britney's next hit, or Jessica's next comeback hit, depending on which melody I ran with. I can practically hear your laughter but it's TRUE, I SWEAR!lol. I seriously had a rockin' good beat going on and NO, it wasn't a rip off of a song I had heard earlier in the day...I don't think. teehee. Do I remember ANY of it?! Sadly, no I do not. And now, I'm positive that I have played a hand in Britney possibly never recording a hit again, or poor Jessica never making a comeback.

Therefore, Britney....Jessica, I love you both, and I am SO sorry. Next time, I WILL get up and write it down, I PROMISE! The next one is yours! Well, atleast one of yours. OOOOHHHHH, I foresee a duet. Hhhmmm, not sure if I love you both THAT much though to want to hear you singing together. Anyway, sorry gals. HUGS!

Because he's funny like that!

I've been tired, messy, coughy, sneezy, weezy, cranky, etc, etc. You name it, I've been it for the past five days. And my husband, well, he's just been a sweetheart even though I haven't been much fun at all. (sorry SWB and thank you).

Anyway, Keith likes to be ahead of everything which is great when it comes to things like our anniversary, my birthday, etc, because he always surprises me in advance which is nice. And I'm always actually surprised even though I caught on to this because he's so random.

Well, here I was, having another day (at home) to face yet another llllooooonnnggg day of doing shyte all which just adds to the crappiness of being sick. If you don't know it already, couping me up for too many days in a row = NOT GOOD in the land of Kim. So I hop on the computer to make sure I haven't missed anything exciting. Did you know that someone posting on FB that their newborn crapped EVERYWHERE can be considered 'exciting' when cabin fever kicks in?! WHO KNEW!!! lol.

To get to the point, I open my email to see a birthday e-card (my birthday is on the 21st) from my adorable husband. Now, if I ever needed a laugh, this was the time and as always, his timing was perfect!!! Be ready to giggle your tushy off. Unless, I'm the only one that finds this funny...if so, I apologize in advance. :)



http://sendables.jibjab.com/view/aA2EVCcyPphU24Ty7eNl

Ding dong (in song)

the witch is dead! Which witch?! The WICKED witch! Okay, so no one is dead (thank god for that) but I got some news today that I consider awesome. Which, at this point, I would consider anything good news since I've been sick for the past four days and have not had tons of contact with the outside world but that's besides the point. All I can say is thank you FACEBOOK (for helping me make it through the past few days, without you, I would have gone CRAZY)! lol.

Anyway, yesterday was our average day minus any activity for myself cause I've been down and out with whatever it is I have. Keith was doing his usual thing by searching the net and checking out what's for sale in Regina (housing wise). He came across a posting that the condo upstairs is for sale. This news + me = EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
Now I've never ranted about this before in my blog that I can recall but our neighbour that lives above us SUCKS the big one. And I say that in the most kind way, I SWEAR!
I mean, can she help it that she does laundry at 5am (sometimes sooner)? Can she help it that she has no nice, neighbourly social skills? Is it her fault she gave me the stink eye one night while I was out for my friend's stagette and happened to be where she was (HOW DARE I)???! Most of all, can she help it that she probably only weighs 100 pounds and sounds like 50 elephants ALL THE TIME?! I know the answer is YES but I tell myself NO so that I dislike her less.lol.

All I have to say, again, is.....EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! Now, we just need the pot smoking, noise making rowdy guy downstairs to leave. AAAAAHHHHH, a girl can dream! Actually, if I could wish for anything it would be for us to move into a bigger place where we don't share anything with neighbours. :)
Also, I believe in karma and I worry that if I get too excited about this, we'll end up with an even worse neighbour above us, so, feel free to shout out some prayers for us. Which, since we're not religious, just keep your freaking fingers crossed for us. Thank you. teehee. :)

Just a thought

So I love the song *Sexy Girl*, also known as *Sexy Bitch*. It has a good beat, catchy words and makes me want to dance like a crazy nut which means that I, would love it. However, the other day I was listening to it and am catching on to the words. A few times the 'artist' says he's trying to find words to describe the girl without being disrespectful and then calls her a sexy bitch. Now, I'm sure some women would take this as a compliment but it's not the most flattering description in my opinion (there I go with my opinions again). When I heard this in the song, my first thought was, well, maybe don't call her a bitch if you don't want to be disrespectful. I'm just saying.....

Some people do ROCK!

Today, was a busy day. I honestly felt like I could have pulled my hair out alongside my co-worker as we were just ssssoooo busy and I was feeling pretty overwhelmed. Now, I've been warned not to post any blogs about work but I think I can make an acception this one time because some people REALLY DO ROCK and it wouldn't be cool of me to not send a shout out to them. And, some of those people that REALLY DO ROCK, just happen to be people that I work with. :)

Now I don't always handle surprises well and am really impressed that I didn't bawl my eyes out. Mostly, I don't think I cried because I had NO IDEA what was happening. For those of you there, you know what I'm referring to and for those of you that don't, feel free to read on:

So today, I'm like 'whoa' busy and I cannot find ANYONE in our department to help me with something which just added to my OMG, I wish I had ten clones of myself.lol. But as I'm searching for someone, my supervisor comes around the corner and is like 'Where is everyone?' and I'm like, 'I was just wondering the SAME THING!' Then, one of my darling co-workers turns up and says, let's go for break and I think, okay, sounds goooood, I could use one. lol. She tells me we have to stop by the cafeteria and refuses to let me go pee first as we 'won't be long' and assures me I can hold it. Well, she lied (about the not being long part, I did however, manage to hold my bladder)!!! lol.

We head to the cafeteria and the doors are closed which usually means there's a 'private function' going on but she just walked right on up and opened the door and ignored my hesitation for reasons soon to be obvious to me. There WAS a private function, and it was for MMMMEEEEE! It only took me like three minutes to figure out....three minutes, that's not bad. Okay, it's bad but I'll admit I was confused and nervous because I had no idea why when my co-worker opened the door, about thirty friendly faces had their eyes on me. Then, our VP walks in and says 'Congratulations Kim' so I'm all like 'Did I get a promotion???' Actually, I think my first response was, but my birthday's not for two more weeks! lol. Then I made the promo comment. hehe.

As it turns out, some of the ladies I work with came up with this plan to throw me a lil' 'Hey, you got MARRIED' party which is just the sweetest thing!!! What's even more super fantastic is that like EVERYONE on our floor got in on it which means so much to me, it really, REALLY does. They went like WAY above and beyond anything I would have ever expected and for that, I am WOWED! There were pictures from our wedding, there was cake and fruit (YUM), and a shower gift, and some wedding gifts and really nice wishes from everyone saying congratulations. It was all very overwhelming and now I think I'm going to cry because it really was amazing and so thoughtful of everyone. :)

I have to say, people have been extremely generous and kind within work and out of work in regards to our marriage. The cards, the gifts, the warm wishes, the love, it's all been so wonderful. Keith and I really do appreciate it and know that there will be times in life where we have the opportunity to return the kindness. :)

Again, Keith and I would like to say thank you to everyone that has gone above and beyond for us in so many ways! :)

ps. Did I mention that MANY people we have in our lives REALLY DO ROCK?! lol.

That's me, Mrs. Negativity.

When I was younger, I used to always find at least one thing I liked about someone that drove me absolutely bonkers. Now, I just spend my time bitching about them.lol. I really don't know what's happening to me! Is it because I'm getting older? Is it because I'm gotten more jaded over time? Or, have I just stopped making excuses for people that act like jerks? Either way, I've noticed that as of late, I spend more time judging and ridiculing people that JUST AREN'T NICE and even people that are nice but are behaving in a way that I never would. Which, in turn, is JUST NOT NICE of me at all! Like, when did I, Kim, become such a saint (apparently...according to myself anyway)??? I mean, I'm not a saint, quite far from it in my opinion. Oh, and that too, all the sudden I have LOTS of opinions! Maybe I've always been this judgemental, opinionated, my shyte don't stink type person but was just better at hiding it from everyone, including myself.lol.

However, this does have me thinking about what I would think of myself if I had a conversation with my 'judgemental self' and I saw all the judging I'm capable of. I would likely walk away thinking, 'Wow, she's pretty judgemental' and I probably wouldn't like me or want to spend time with me. The funny thing is, the 'non-judgemental' me would be judging my 'judgemental' self so I'd be back at square one. Did I lose you yet? lol.

All I know is that it has to end for my sanity is at stake. I mean, after I go on a rant, I feel like an ass because, well, I behaved like one so I had it coming. I figure I need to take my opinions, my judgemental self, my crankiness and all the other toxic traits that have been plaguing me and shove 'em. Why? Because I don't want to spend more of my life bitching about things than I did enjoying all the good things, because let's be honest, my life is good and I know it.

But mostly, I miss the old me and want her back. She was much more FUN for me to be around!lol. :)